It is okay to say goodbye!

Written by Coach Kim

Edited by Marla Reese Martin

Life is full of “goodbyes”. You have said so many goodbyes in your life. Just think about when you left elementary school to go to high school, moving away for college, quitting jobs, breaking up with a boyfriend, or losing a loved one. All these goodbyes had an impact on the person you are now and the path you took in your life. Hard to believe but some goodbyes are good for you! At some point in your life, toxic people will surround you and you may have to cut ties. Even if these goodbyes are necessary, they are not easy. Here are a few reasons why you may consider saying goodbye to someone you loved.

Knowing your worth

My daughter recently told me that I have changed. She said I look more confident and happier than few years ago. She is right but hearing it from a 10-years-old was very powerful. I spent a lot of time learning to know myself and now I know my worth. If you know yourself, you know your strengths and weaknesses. You know your values and beliefs, and you will be less likely to keep toxic people around. You will look for people that treat you well and share similar values.

Others enrich your life but aren’t your life

People you let enter in your life should contribute to your happiness; they should never be the reason of your happiness. Surround yourself with people that lift you up, inspire you or make you feel safe. Having positive people around will help you move forward in life with a positive outcome. Remember, unhappy people cannot make others feel good. Their pain is not yours to bare. Be a good friend. Support, listen, and love, but never let it become your reality.

Consider what you offer and expect the same in return

I was reading an article on dating recently and the author was saying that you can only expect what you can give. This applies to any type of relationship. Before pointing fingers at others, stop and think about the way you treat people. If you treat people with respect, you should not be with people that disrespect you. If you do not scream at people, people should not scream at you. This is establishing what you want in your life and creating the standard to surround yourself with quality people.

Being yourself around others

If you can’t fully be yourself around people you love, this is not normal. People that love you will not try to change you. Don’t get me wrong, they will tell you how to improve certain aspects of your life, give their opinion but will never make you feel bad to be who you are. You also should not walk on eggshells and be scared of being yourself. We often hear divorced couples say they broke up because they changed. We all change and sometimes differently. Not everyone will embrace your changes and it is okay. When you change and people cannot accept it or embrace it, you may have to say goodbye.

The main thing to retain from this article is learn to know who you are and what you want. You can create an environment of love and respect so everyone has the potential to become the best version of themselves. Let me know your comments in the blog below!

Coach Kim